Dylan's Candy Bar, New York, NY

Mom:

Sugar Heaven in Manhattan

I’ve never realized it, but it seems I might have claustrophobia…   It gripped me when I stepped into Dylan’s Candy Bar on one of the most sweltering days in Manhattan.   I was grateful for the blast of cool air when I stepped through the door but the crush of bodies (of various sizes from knee high to living room wide) swarmed around me and made me dizzy and short of breath.  The Teen was manically pointing and saying “OMG”  “WHOA”, “ COOL” and  other monosyllabic statements in a higher pitch than normal.  Apparently, the way one operates in these types of stores is to randomly grab something and dart around.  Grab and dart.  Grab and dart.   Gulp, I needed to go "within!"  Close my eyes…..deep breaths…… oh yes, inhale……..ahhh, exhale………..going to my happy place...  

Then out of my “soft focus” eyes, I spotted a different kind of happy place.   A WALL of chocolate bars.  Rubbing my eyes to make sure I wasn’t hallucinating, I drifted over, avoiding all the darting ankle biters.   There, in my new happy place, I came upon Le Whif.  Aerosol chocolate you inhale!  ONE calorie per “puff.”   The box looks suspiciously like a box of cigarettes… wait a sec, is this stuff even legal?   Inhaling chocolate?  Is that the kind of thing you do when you're a wealthy American being held captive in the Colombian jungles by the FARC for ten plus years?   As I reached for a box of Dark Chocolate Le Whif, the Teen pops up with a “See anything interesting?”  NO!  Nothing.  Nada.  Just M&Ms.    Visions of her sharing Le Whif with her friends as souvenirs and THEIR parent's horrified reactions at their teens sitting around snorting chocolate  made me quickly steer her and myself to the cashier with a few cute canisters of mints. 

Teen:

“Greetings loved ones, let’s take a journey.”  These are the first lyrics of Snoop Dog in California Gurls by Katy Perry. In the music video, Katy Perry explores a candyland, which we all KNOW doesn’t exist ……I BEG TO DIFFER.  It isn’t filled with cotton candy clouds and girls with hair-do’s of very unusual colors dressed in candy, BUT Dylan’s Candy Bar is the closest thing we have to resemble Katy Perry’s sweet heaven.

"There must be something in the water."

We started on the crowded first floor of the giant candy shop. Wait a moment, is that a chocolate fountain I smell?!?! Indeed it is, and right by the fountain are graham crackers and marshmallows to make your own s’more. Mmm-mm. The candy stairs pull me toward the other levels, and Mom had no choice but to follow my unconscious action. The second floor is filled with M&M’s and Belgian chocolate bars in various flavors. I made a quick grab at whatever my shaky hands could manage and assembled gifts for my “fine fresh fierce” friends. Mom of course noticed some low calorie chocolate called Le Whif. …that alone just sounds wrong, yet so interesting. So far, I’d say this “journey” is going quite well. The third floor is a café…of course Mom didn’t want to be stuck in my candyland heaven forever so she quickly said, “I’m sure it’s just regular food.” Doubting, but agreeing that it was probably the safest idea not to go up there, we headed out.  

Now, “I know a place where the grass is really greener.”